Why make it all about being shitty?

            

When I began the adventure as co-admin of this blog, I said that I would only write responses from the other side of the fence on topics that I only had a large opinion on. As it turns out, maybe I do have a primarily large opinion on most everything. Rolling onward, in response to coprolite fossils and the obvious shaking of the head my personal nerd showed, I differ. For one, saying that coprolite is not a million dollar investment is not exactly true. All of the coprolite that will ever exist already does.  I was watching the same show that introduced us to the topic and the man selling it only had a couple lbs of the stuff and was offered a couple thousand dollars. Yes, it is dinosaur poop. However, we as humans have a natural wonder for dinosaurs because when they existed, we were NOT at the top of the food chain. Can you take a shit that big? ((No pics, please)) Now here’s the good stuff: the main use of coprolite is to make jewelry!!! My nerd asked, “Would you actually wear dinosaur poop as an accessory?”   My response was, “It would have to be really pretty”.  The topic continued to be brought up, and as a result my curiosity got the best of me. I googled coprolite jewelry, and IT IS really pretty! Most of the jewelry that I found is sold on etsy, which would give me pause on authenticity. How do you prove to someone that the coprolite you are selling them is, indeed, dinosaur poop, and especially over the internet. I digress. The thought of wearing such a pretty gem ((Yes, it is a gem and needs to be polished before you get all of the colors)) is not so hard to muster up because of two reasons:  (1) It does not stink, though I imagine at one point it was atrocious (2) Half the dumbasses I meet wouldn’t believe me anyway and would probably just ‘bless my heart’ when I left said party for getting ripped off…because surely coprolite/dinosaur poop is a scam for idiots. Bless my heart. It just occurred to me that coprolite is proof that polishing a turd ain't always a bad thing.  And guys (or ladies), you probably won’t get laid with a line about dinosaur dung collecting**CHALLENGE**; however, you will PROBABLY get laid if you offer to show her your rare gem collection that is often used to make one of a kind pieces, you know, for a one of a kind girl. More than likely, if she thinks to ask what kind of gem, she won’t know what coprolite is and won’t want to seem stupid for asking. If she does ask, again, you have 2 choices. (1) Tell her and hope that you’ve already scored enough brownie points in the convo to keep it going, (2) have google at the ready to show them a pic of a really pretty coprolite piece ((of jewelry)).  This lady right here wouldn’t mind at all being the person at the party showing off her dinosaur shit necklace.